In all the family relations, the relation for mother and her son's wife would be the most difficult one to deal with. Each time of those mothers meets together, they can't help discussing about their bad behavior daughter in-law, and the same to the meetings for those daughters in-law, in order to maintain mutual relations, it is conceivable that how hard will be to the man sitting between his mother and wife.
Why it is so difficult for them to get along harmoniously? Some researchers give their understanding to this phenomenon by Freud Psychology, it can be explained through their desire for possession and Oedipus complex. Then if we analyze it from social psychology, what we can get? It is found that people in china are likely to maintain their social relations by adopting two points standard, one is the distance between the two characters, the other is up to the true feeling transfering and their mutual responsibility.
In general, all the family members are not only having the blood relationship, but also because of the day and day being together, they have formed a true feeling and love to each other. When a man or female for the reason of love stepping into a new family, which has no blood relationship, it mainly drives by emotions. The marriage brings their couple relations, and also a series of family relations, at this time, the bride would suddenly fall into the web relations, among which, the most important must be the relation with her mother in-law. From the side of daughters in-law, due to the few contact with their husbands' family before marriage, so their true love may just show to their husbands, but to the family of their husbands, they may only feel responsibility to them. This emotion of responsibility is just a kind of responsibility, and people are easy to skimp over it, they may think that their mothers in-law are not the one to bring them up, but because of the marriage, they should take good care of them, and this kind of treatment even their parents have not been got, it is really enough for them. However, in the heart of mothers in-law, they would think that once you have entered this family, you are one of the family members, and should act just like a daughter in-law. One is emphasizing the true feelings, while the other aims more on the responsibility, that causes the both sides dissatisfied with each other.
Orignal From: The psychological origin of the bad relation between Chinese mother and daughter in-law
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